The Big Bounce

1/31/04 - Review

Most people go to Hawaii for vacation at one of its many beautiful locations.  Some people use it for deception and high priced crimes.  Jack Ryan (Owen Wilson) traveled to Hawaii on the North Shore of Oahu to try and avoid all of this, if possible.  Crime has filled his past and its something he is trying to forget but it is hard when temptation is everywhere. 

Jack soon lands himself in jail after clocking his construction foremen with an aluminum bat.  The owner of the construction company, Ray Ritchie (Gary Sinise), wants him to leave the island permanently so he sends his right hand man Bob Jr. (Charlie Sheen) in to escort him out.  Unfortunately for Ritchie, Jack hooks up with a district judge named Walter Crewes (Morgan Freeman) who offers him a job.  Jack graciously accepts even though Walter is curious about his troubled past and what he has in store in the future. 

Jack tries to avoid all of the temptation that is thrown at him but he soon hooks up with a sexy beach girl, Nancy Hayes (Sara Foster).  She is very interested in Jack’s criminal side and plans on robbing Ritchie of the $200,000 in his house safe.  Jack is in a bit of a bind because he wants to get away from all of this stuff but it is hard when Nancy uses her seduction abilities to pull him in.  Something is not right about the situation because everyone seems to have their own agenda for this “Big Bounce.”  But like Walter taught Jack, everything is what it seems.    

You have probably noticed some pretty bad reviews of this movie all across the Internet.  Well guess what?  They are right.  This movie is absolutely terrible and has no value whatsoever.  At no point in the movie was I even remotely interested.
I hate to even waste my time writing a review for this movie, if you can call it that.   

The movie has so many problems with it that are too many to list.  The movie is just dumb, boring, and a total waste of time and money.  The movie ran about 90 minutes but it felt more like three hours with the god-awful pacing.  It just seemed that the movie was about a couple of people standing around and committing adultery on one another.  Little would you know that it was a about everybody screwing everybody else over with their shady scheming.  The previews make it look like a comedy when in fact I think I laughed one time, probably out of pity. 

The Big Bounce features a lot of well known actors, including Owen Wilson, Morgan Freeman, Charlie Sheen, Gary Sinise, and the wife of Frasier Crane from the hit series. It didn’t really matter who was in it though because it wouldn’t have helped make this movie any better.  The acting I saw in this movie was some of the worst that I have ever seen in my life.  None of the characters showed any emotion but instead they were all lifeless.  I could care less what happened to their individual characters.  I think Owen Wilson is a halfway decent actor but you certainly wouldn't notice it in this movie.  Morgan Freeman did an okay job but the screen time was very little to help make a difference.  Sara Foster was only thrown into this movie for eye candy because that's the only thing going for her.  On a side note, Willie Nelson made a cameo. 

I think that everybody should definitely stay away from this movie.  In fact, do not even rent it or watch it on TV when it premieres.  It is that bad and I think the only way you might enjoy it is if you are high on some good drugs.  If you do decide to waste your time and money, you will agree with me that the best part of the movie is when it ends. I couldn’t have been happier.   

Grade

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